It's not a bad thing.

So many of my friends ask me why i'm still single...why i haven't started working on a real relationship. I always give them the same answer...'cause i love my money too much'. But that isn't the only reason. I see how miserable my married/serious relationship friends are. They always complain about this or that, and constantly look at other women. Granted every guy looks at a cute girl but sometimes i wonder if they would actually pursue cheating. I wonder if they're just trying to 'recruit' me into their miserable married men club or something. Whenever i look at myself i see a singular presence...i don't think a woman would make me any better than i am now, as far as i'm concerned it would only make me worse. Sure i get lonely sometimes but i have friends to help me with that, and sure the lack of steady sex is kinda a drag but i have opportunities i can pursue if i so choose. As far as love goes i think Al Pacino said it best in The Devil's Advocate...'What about love?' 'Overrated. Biochemically no different than eating mass quantities of chocolate.'

Today's song of the day is Dope - Always

Let's go back to the start
Like it use to be
Before you fell apart
And you blamed it on me
Back when you were my friend
Do you remember back when
All the plans that we made
Can we get back to those days

Those days come every now and again
No way I feel like this is the end but

Always is in your eyes
In all ways I realize
That always is you and I
Always

Let's go back to the start
Like it use to be
Before your broken heart
And your hatred for me
Back when all this began
Do you remember back then
All the plans that we made
Can we get back to those days

Always is in your eyes
In all ways I realize
That always is you and I
Always

Is there any wonder I'm not right
Where do we go now where do we go now
Is there any wonder you wont fight
Where do we go now where do we go now
Have there been to many wrongs to right
I'd say goodbye but

Always is in your eyes
In all ways I realize
That always is you and I
Always

Even my dreams have a soundtrack.

So the other week i had a dream that actually had a soundtrack. I didn't think much of it cause it was a rather silly dream with a weird tracklist...Lisa Loeb followed by Fear Factory. But just now i had one with a more profound song in the background...Gin Blossoms 'Found Out About You'. Seems like this one kinda reminded me of Anna. No not Anna Paquin. I dated a girl named Anna a little after high school. It was meaningless really, i really didn't care about her much, she was more there because i was bored. Eventually i found out from her friend Melissa that she was cheating on me. That was the first time i was flagrantly cheated on, and to be honest i really didn't care. Probably because i got with Melissa not long after for yet another meaningless relationship. Eventually i got smart and detached from that group completely. The coolest thing about dating Anna was the fact that she lived next door to my old history teacher...Mr Chorney. I remember one time i was banging her and the window was open and i knew he could hear us since he was doing yardwork...so out of the blue i shouted 'MR CHORNEY YOU TAUGHT ME SO MUCH!' I'm glad i'm not all crazy like that anymore...mostly.

Todays song of the day is Gin Blossoms - Found Out About You

All last summer in case you don't recall
I was yours and you were mine forget it all
Is there a line that I could write
Sad enough to make you cry
All the lines you wrote to me were lies
The months roll past the love that you struck dead
Did you love me only in my head?
Things you said and did to me
Seemed to come so easily
The love I thought I'd won you give for free
Whispers at the bus stop
I heard about nights out in the school yard
I found out about you
Rumors follow everywhere you go
Like when you left and I was last to know
You're famous now and there's no doubt
In all the places you hang out
They know your name and know what you're about
Whispers at the bus stop
I heard about nights out in the school yard
I found out about you
Street lights blink on through the car window
I get the time too often on AM radio
You know it's all I think about
I write your name drive past your house
Your boyfriend's over I watch your light go out
Whispers at the bus stop
I heard about nights out in the school yard
I found out about you